I have a t-shirt in my closet that reads, “We have enough
youth. How about a fountain of smart?” The implication, of course, is that
being young somehow excludes being smart. (I will confess I also had this as a
poster in my classroom where I taught high school English. Lots of kids didn’t
get it.) As I reflect on it now, I suspect I was inadvertently falling into the
old vs young culture wars that have droned on since the sixties. I remember
playing Bob Dylan anti-war songs in a Madison bar in the early ‘70s and arguing
with some blue collar workers in the audience about “peace and love, man”.
Needless to say, we never played there again. We Baby Boomers set a trap for
ourselves by making youth the defining ingredient of the good life. True, we
also included drugs, sex, and rock and roll, but it was easier to recover from
those things when I was younger. Go to a Springsteen concert and watch the
crowd try to “get down and boogie”. Wow. Don’t get me wrong. Springsteen’s
music is great, but the “boogie” part is harder. Why do we have to pretend we
are something other than what we are? Here are some random thoughts about being
old in 2016.
If your
face is wrinkled, it’s ok. The sun and wind and tanning beds do that to skin. Just
remember there is a Face Lifts Gone Wrong website. I know. I saw it. Wow.
If
you’re bald, it’s ok. You don’t need a wig or a hair transplant. Also remember,
shaving your head will not help you be like Yul Brynner. Don’t know Yul? Look
him up.
If you
like beer or coffee that isn’t “hand crafted”, it’s ok. Charging 3 dollars for
a cup of coffee or 6 dollars for a glass of beer doesn’t make them taste
better.
If the
music is too loud, it’s ok to go somewhere else. Some people like to shout over
the music and wake up hoarse. Some of us actually enjoy talking to our friends.
If you
find yourself wishing you had traveled more or found a different job, don’t
feel alone. EVERYBODY wants do overs. Even those who were good at carpe diem
wonder how things might have been different. One of the burdens we humans must
bear is the knowledge that we can’t completely appreciate the experience of
living. And it does little good to lecture the young about it. Remember how you
blew off all that advice from those “old foggies” when you were a kid? Get used
to second guessing yourself.
If you
find yourself growing weary of the same old movie plot lines, try to be
patient. The urge to create heroic endings for our lives is strong, but it
doesn’t have to be phony. Find those films that are trying to reveal what
really matters in our lives. Most cancer victims do not see themselves as
heroes nor do most soldiers. Eugene O’Neill suggested that what makes us noble
is our willingness to carry on despite the certainty of our ending.
Ultimately,
we all need to keep our sense of humor. If a young man believes a tattoo across
his face is important, who am I to contradict him? Who am I to say, “WHAT THE
HELL WERE YOU THINKING?” I’ll just smile and wish him well. If a young
lady wants to dye her hair bright green, I will keep my sense of humor and
laugh next to her, not at her. See? And when others try to suggest I have a few
weird hobbies, too, I will tell them – good naturedly - they don’t know what the hell they are
talking about. Come to think of it, I know a lot of old people who do really
stupid things, too.
Never
mind. Maybe that t-shirt should read – “We have enough stupidity. How about a
fountain of wisdom?”
